"And all the books you've read have been read by other people. And all the songs you've loved have been heard by other people. And that girl that's pretty to you is pretty to other people. and that if you looked at these facts when you were happy, you would feel great because you are describing 'unity."

I'm not happy with 'unity'. The girl I love will be loved by other people and the songs i love will be loved by other people and what's beautiful to me is beautiful to other people. I don't want it that way. When it's this way it just shows that I'm nothing different, ever. I'm nothing special, I'm nothing that will be the only person for a special person.

The songs I share with someone will be shared with someone else, the jokes i share will be shared with someone else, the memories, the places, the situations, the love, the like, the lust, the anger and the pain. It wont be anything after a while. Because it's already been felt, It's already been there with someone else.

If anything, I'm not as good as the other's sharing what i have. I will always have to share. I don't want to share. I want what's mine to be mine and want to be mine. There's always the purpose of hope, i guess.

I give up.

fuck.